She's JV to your varsity
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
