I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
