Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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