Texts From Last Night

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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money

  (813): View more from Florida

  sounds like you understand them just fine

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  (901): I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money (813): sounds like you understand them just fine http://tfl.nu/0zfp
  Replies (10) Good night (1556) Bad night (624)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  ..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.

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  (248): ..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe. http://tfl.nu/gys8
  Replies (10) Good night (2974) Bad night (625) Order T-Shirt
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm

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  (386): Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm http://tfl.nu/fmji
  Replies (12) Good night (546) Bad night (4156) Order T-Shirt
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  (850): View more from Florida

  it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday

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  (850): it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday http://tfl.nu/fl8q
  Replies (2) Good night (3052) Bad night (723) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich

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  (717): Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich http://tfl.nu/kdwm
  Replies (5) Good night (687) Bad night (2263) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.

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  (636): I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle. http://tfl.nu/niba
  Replies (6) Good night (2160) Bad night (693) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?

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  (613): what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world? http://tfl.nu/dgrx
  Replies (9) Good night (2057) Bad night (915) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it

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  (973): I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it http://tfl.nu/vptm
  Replies (7) Good night (3497) Bad night (1450) Order T-Shirt
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...

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  (514): We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one... http://tfl.nu/kexj
  Replies (11) Good night (2683) Bad night (646) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.

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  (206): You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want. http://tfl.nu/h1r5
  Replies (5) Good night (479) Bad night (1226) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.

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  (586): I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food. http://tfl.nu/52ze
  Replies (27) Good night (1280) Bad night (1339)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.

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  (210): We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do. http://tfl.nu/emf3
  Replies (6) Good night (920) Bad night (522) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!

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  (303): Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?! http://tfl.nu/om37
  Replies (23) Good night (2635) Bad night (615) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.

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  (360): Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home. http://tfl.nu/g7t7
  Replies (8) Good night (1508) Bad night (522) Order T-Shirt
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  How's dating the med student working out for you?

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  A true anatomy project.

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  (414): How's dating the med student working out for you? (715): After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was. (414): A true anatomy project. http://tfl.nu/in9w
  Replies (2) Good night (869) Bad night (152)

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