You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm just crazy horny about you
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
