i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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