Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
