No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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