Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
