I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
