I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
