I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
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And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
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Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
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