Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Be still, my beating vagina.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
