You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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