She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
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Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
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Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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