we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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