they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My liver just had a heart attack.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
