just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
