Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
whose ass print is on the piano?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
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