i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
