My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
So much Jack, so little girl.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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