We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
