Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize