There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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