If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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