just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Randomize
