I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
My breasts were aching with rage.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
He has the fingertips of a God
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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