? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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