Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So squirting runs in the family.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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