I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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