dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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