i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
