Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
