Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
