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• (480): View more from Arizona

  I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (845): View more from New York

  What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.

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• (845): View more from New York

  Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.

  (702): View more from Nevada

  To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.

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