I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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