Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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