im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
