The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
