oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
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