EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
