covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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