And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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