I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
You're like the curious george of whores
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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