i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
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