He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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