Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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