K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
