hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
