Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize