I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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